Archive | September, 2010

Quite Possibly the Shortest Advice Book Ever

19 Sep

I hate when even a good movie is long.

Me: That movie was sooooooooo long!

Friend: It was about the Crimean War.

Me: I know. It was sooooooooo long! And what was with Brad Pitt’s hair?!

Well Paul Arden’s book, It’s Not How Good You Are, It’s How Good You Want to Be does not have that problem.

Instead, it is awesome. And the title says it all. It’s not how good you are (though let’s not get crazy, being good helps.)

Have you ever met someone that has accomplished a lot or is extremely popular and you expected them to have a golden aura, perfect SAT scores, or at least a pleasant personality? But instead, you realized they are just human (and/or annoying/insane.)

If you haven’t experienced this yet you will. Over and over again. And instead of finding it discouraging, you should find it motivating. I find myself saying all the time, If that idiot can do it, SO CAN I! (Though not out loud, because that is rude.)

Or have you ever come across a simple idea and thought, WHY didn’t I think of that? Or worse, Hey, I thought of that!

Well then this book is for you.

Now I’m not trying to undermine or delegitimize successful people. I’m not a Bitter Betty and I am happy for anyone who becomes successful (as long as they aren’t a huge jerk…). I’m simply saying you are probably able to pull off more than you think.

The author, Paul Arden talks about how often successful people are not necessarily the most talented people. They aren’t necessarily the smartest and they probably didn’t win “Most Likely to Succeed.” They have the biggest, I mean they are the boldest people. As it says on the Barnes and Noble website, the book is  “a pocket bible for the talented and timid to help make the unthinkable and the impossible possible.”

So don’t get down on yourself because you didn’t get straight A’s, weren’t the most popular, or weren’t the best at any particular thing. Those things aren’t a prereq for success. Even the Bill Gates of the world mess up.

This book report is almost as long as the book, so you should probably just read the real thing.

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Its-Not-How-Good-You-Are-Its-How-Good-You-Want-to-Be/Paul-Arden/e/9780714843377

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What Do You Do if a Date is Really Bad and You Want to Leave?

12 Sep

Dear Losers,

What do you do if a date is really bad and you want to leave?

Taylor, 19

Dear Reader,

Depends on what kind of bad. If it’s just awkward bad, or you don’t have butterflies bad, I suggest you stay. Not every date is going to be great, or fun. We all have nightmare dating stories, so you might as well start collecting your own.

Here’s one of mine, for inspiration.

I once went on a date with a guy a few years my junior.

I’ll admit I was hesitant, but I didn’t want to be closed minded and yes, okay, he worked for a country music magazine and said he could get me free tickets. So I went.

I know.

I was not expecting anything fancy, but after driving 30 minutes to meet him, I expected something a bit more noteworthy than Fuddruckers, a chain in my OWN TOWN.

To make matters worse, he acted like a huge jerk, bragging about himself the whole time, and not asking me any questions. It was as if he was an actor performing a monologue, but one that was not interesting. I grinned and bared his behavior, even after he answered a phone call from another girl, flirted with the girl at length, then hung up and said the girl was TOTALLY stalking him.

Uh yeah, you can’t stalk the willing, Buddy.

Semantics aside, after what seemed like an eternity, the date ended. And he didn’t even walk me to my car, or watch me walk to my car. No, no. That would have been too easy. Well-mannered, even. Instead, he dropped me off at the entrance to the parking garage.

Rude.com/whereareyouremanners/unsafe

And then he burned out.

I know what you’re thinking. How could I let the man of my dreams walk, excuse me, burn out of my life like that?

Anyway, yes good manners dictate that you would stay on the date even if you want to leave. Afterall, it is the classy thing to do because no one likes to be stood up, or ditched.

But there are a few fun exceptions. 🙂

1. If you are being mistreated in any way, leave. If Johnny Jerk is being mean, rude or out of control, you do not need to stay. I probably could have ditched that toddler at Fuddruckers, but I guess I really wanted my Oreo milkshake?

2.  If you don’t feel safe, leave.  Chances are you don’t know this person well, s0 don’t feel obligated to hangout with a stranger if they seem creepy, dangerous or ill-intentioned. Trust your instincts. And if you don’t know the person well, suggest meeting them on the date.

If you came together, and you’re getting creepo vibes, say something came up, and call someone to pick you up. Always have a cab programmed in your phone as well in case all of your friends are on bad dates too. And tell your friends and family exactly where you are going before you leave.

Otherwise, grin and bear it. It’s a first date, and there doesn’t have to be a second. And actually, you can avoid agonizing and awkward dates by taking control of the situation in the beginning and keeping your plans short and simple.

Don’t commit your whole evening or day to a guy you barely know. Stick to dinner or a movie, not both. Coffee or ice cream even works. If you’re having the time of your lives you crazy kids can always extend the date or plan another one.

And if you don’t want to extend the date, or you want to cut the date short, you can simply say you have other plans. No need for a crazy excuse or an iPhone app that calls your phone.  And this way you were polite and stayed for the whole date, even though it was short. See how smart(/sneaky) you are!

Just steer clear of first dates that sound like, I was thinking we could go hiking and find this hidden waterfall, skip rocks and talk about our childhoods, cross the Bridge to Terabithia, then take the tram over to the Getty and find the Kogi Truck downtown.

And he’s going to bring you back when? NEXT WEEK?!

In conclusion, choose your dates wisely, plan your dates wisely, and never hope for free concert tickets.

And if you’re stuck on a bad date, just remember…. the worst dates make the best stories.

What’s a good thing to wear on a first date?

5 Sep

Dear Losers,

What’s a good thing to wear on a first date?

-Sophie, 17

Dear Reader,

Fringe, fringe, and more fringe! Animal prints are going to be huge this season. Maybe some leopard print shoes or a croco-bag. You can never go wrong with a LBD (Little Black Dress). Pearls are always classic.

Oh sorry. Wrong blog.

I’m no Rachel Zoe, but I don’t think there’s a formula for first date chic. Go with your own style and dress how you normally dress. There’s no need to run out and buy the latest and greatest.

Here are a few tips to keep you looking and feeling fabulous on any first date:

  • Wear something you feel comfortable in. Not gym comfortable, but cute comfortable. So don’t wear those too tight jeans that leave you gasping for air, or the heels that cut up your feet. And if you’re not a heels kinda girl, a first date may not be the best place to try them out.

“But they look so good!”

I get it. And so do other things in your closet. So please pick clothes and shoes that aren’t a personal safety hazard. You have enough to worry about (ie: is there something in my teeth, is there something in his teeth etc) without worrying about somersaulting down the stairs.

  • Dress for the occasion/venue. You’re obviously going to dress differently if you’re going on a hike than if you’re going to his sister’s wedding.
  • If you’re worried about looking like you’re trying too hard, you’re probably not. You look good, you feel good. And the girls who look like they’re trying too hard aren’t usually the one’s who are sitting around worrying about it.

(bestweekever.tv)

 

They’re too busy applying their prom makeup, body makeup, and fake eyelashes. And getting their nails done with the Chanel logo.

  • If you are still concerned, a lot of clothing is versatile. For example, if you’re a jeans and t shirts girl, and you’re worried about being too casual you can dress up your outfits with cute wedges, heels, or jewelry. If you’re a dress and heels girl and you’re worried about looking too fancy, you can dress things down with flats.

I'm sorry what?! No shoes, no shirt, no date.

Bottom line, always err on the side of looking nice. If he shows up looking like frumpytownUSA, that’s his problem. And if that’s the case, it’ll probably be your first and last date.

Last but not least, know that you care about what you’re wearing ten zillion times more than the guy does. I’ve never heard a boy say,

You know, I really liked her, but her outfit just wasn’t trend on.

And if a boy does say that, he doesn’t like girls. So it’s a win/win.

5 Reasons Why You’ll Love The Like

2 Sep

If you haven’t heard of them, The Like is an all-girl band from Los Angeles (The Like on Myspace).

They describe their music as “The Supremes in Stereo.”

They’re awesome.

Here’s why:

1. They look and sound retro. Don’t you love anything that feels like you’re in a different time and place (minus wars and famines)?! Especially if that time and place looks anything like That Thing You Do?!

2. Their music and lyrics are awesome which is a rare combo. My favorite song is Release Me. My favorite song title is Narcissus in a Red Dress. Clever.

3. They’ve got great hair and clothes. (I never promised this list would be superficial-free.)

4. They’re an all-girl band and I miss the spice girls. No, I’m not equating the two so hold your angry emails. I’m just saying, “Girl Power!” (British Accent)

5. Bargains. You can download a free song at their website- The Like, and their CD comes out September 6!

For more info and to listen to their music:

The Like on Myspace

The Like on Facebook

Or follow them on twitter at ilovethelike. Listen and tell us what you think below!