Archive | March, 2011

Random Recommendation: Dreyer’s Girl Scouts Limited Edition Ice Cream!

30 Mar

As a former girl scout, I have had my share of girl scout cookies. (Your parents usually buy the most boxes.)

I still get giddy every girl scout cookie season. When I see my first box of samoas, I am like OMG WHERE DID YOU GET THOSE?!

As if I’ve never seen them before.

But I don’t know many girl scouts these days, and cookie season does not last forever, okay?

So imagine my glee when I found Dreyers girl scout ice cream in my grocery freezer!  I LOVE Dreyers. I used to live close to their old factory and go on field trips there. Jealous?? (Said like a mean girl)

Anyway apparently that factory is closed now. But at least there is still Girl Scout Cookie ice cream! Try it, it’s amazing.  Samoa is obviously my favorite, but the others are great too. It’s only available from Jan-April so get some soon!

On the Dreyers website you can see where they sell it in your area. That way you don’t have to yell, OMG WHERE DID YOU GET THOSE?!, like a crazy person too. You’ll just know.

http://www.dreyers.com/brand/funflavors/flavor.asp?b=1420&f=2797

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Can you be friends with an ex?

28 Mar

Dear Losers,

Can you be friends with an ex?

Christine, 18

Dear Reader,

Yes. Friends with ben-e-fits! (Cue obnoxious laughter)

GQ Magazine April 2009

I’m kidding. Honestly, it depends on SO many things.

1. What this ex-boyfriend wants from you.

2. How long and seriously you dated.

And,

3. How psycho he is, or you are.

If your answers to questions 1 through 3 sound a lot like,

1. He still wants to date me.

2. We dated the first 3 seasons of Teen Mom.

And,

3. He’s psycho. And so am I.

Then no, you probably can’t. You should probably stay far away from each other.  Or communicate through a plexiglass wall.

Some people have strong and unyielding opinions on this topic. They will say, “No, never! Sell his stuff on ebay and pretend he never existed!”

Others will say, “Of COURSE you can! Stay his friend so you won’t feel bad keeping that Tiffany’s necklace!”


But it really depends on the relationship. Some people can pull off staying friends with their exes with great style. They make it look easy.  Other people get fire in their eyes at the mere mention of their ex.

The problem is a lot of people want to stay friends because it’s hard to break up. You dated for awhile and then all of the sudden you never speak? Then he puts you on Facebook limited profile view? Then he doesn’t even acknowledge your presence at school?? Um, RUDE! You did NOT sign up for this!

It’s a strange and stressful transition.

And to make matters more confusing,  during the break up, one or both parties actually utters the words, I think we are better off as friends.  Sometimes they mean it. Other times, they heard someone say it in a movie and thought, Cool! So that’s what people say in breakups! (As they pull out a notepad)

No Strings Attached 2011

But don’t panic. Staying friends can work, depending on your maturity level. I saw these people on The Today Show – two of them were a couple, and the other woman was his ex-wife, and they told Al Roker,

“We’re all best friends!”

Wt$@*%!  Wow.  How modern and yet also, very Sister Wives of you.

Then there is everyone else.

Some exes will pull the friend card just to keep trying to get back together with you. They’ll spell your name in fire on your front lawn and when you ask them to politely put it out and go away, they yell,

“But I thought we were FRIENDS!!! YOU JERK!”

Then you yell back,

“FRIENDS don’t makeout with FRIENDS, JERK!” (Window slam.) (Window open.)  “Okay, well some do.  But I DON’T!” (Second window slam.)

Sadly, the “I thought we were friends” threat (and arson) works on some people. How many times have you heard a girl say,

“I know, but I feel bad! And we said we’d stay friends and always be there for each other.”

Yes. That’s very sweet. But he’s watching you on Google Earth. He wrote you a poem and even tea stained it and burned the edges to make it look antique.

HE’S STILL IN LOVE WITH YOU!

He doesn’t want to be your friend. So stop letting him hold you hostage for it.

As strange as it sounds, when it comes to the opposite sex, love is not always a solid foundation for a friendship. So figure out what works for you and your ex. You have to do what is healthy for you and your future relationships. If he’s still in love with you, or you’re still in love with him, you might want to wait until things cool down. Then, if you want to be friends, great. If you don’t, that’s okay too.

And it doesn’t mean you can’t be friendly. Yes, some exes are hostile. But some high-five, or text you on your birthday.

Elle Magazine

And others become besties like that trio on The Today Show.

How do you know when a guy is hitting on you?

17 Mar

Dear Losers

How do you know when a guy is hitting on you?

Phoebe, 17

Hi?

You know when you’re in a crowd and someone is waving in your direction and you can’t tell if they’re waving at you? And you don’t want to wave back (for fear of looking like a loser if they aren’t waving at you), but you don’t want to not wave back (for fear of looking like a loser if they are waving at you)? So you do the frantic back and forth, trying to assess the situation. And then you give them a creepy half smile because you STILL can’t tell?

My point is, like an uncertain wave, it’s hard to tell when a boy is hitting on you.  We all have friends that are The Girl Who Cried Hit On Me. You know, the girl that is always throwing around the phrase, Ugh and he was totally hitting on me! And you think to yourself what does that mean? Did he ask you out? Tell you you looked pretty? Offer you a lint roller?

Then you find out it was Johnny. Really? I mean I caught that guy winking at a wall the other day. But okay, whatever you say.

So you think to yourself, I don’t want to be that girl. And then you are Overcautious Odette.

The problem is, people use the term differently. Some girls use the term loosely, and will say a guy was hitting on her when he flirted with her, stared at her boobs, or just asked to copy her homework. That’s fine. To each her own. I mean,  I wouldn’t go running through the streets like Paul Revere saying that person hit on me.

Everybody wake up! Someone just hit on me!

But that’s just me.

I think it’s  best to use the term cautiously.  As in, someone is hitting on someone when they ask them out or showed interest in asking them out.  If it’s too fuzzy than you can file it under, Maybe he’s hitting on me, Maybe he’s just a flirty person, or Maybe he’s just European category.

I’ve had guys I thought were maybe hitting on me, only to find out they are totally in love with their girlfriend. Or boyfriend!

I wish there was a Judge Judy for all things dating related. And she could rule whether the defendant was hitting on the plaintiff or just really needed a cup of sugar.

You hit on her! Case dismissed!

Yes we’ve all had to ponder what a guy really thinks about us. Sometimes what’s crystal clear to the guy is ambiguous to us girls. In our defense, every guy has a different approach. There are the passive, timid guys who are shy and subtle in their approach and then there are the obnoxious, offensive guys who try to shout a holler on the street.  And, ps what do guys think they’re going to get out of a sleazy cat call?

He had me at, Heeeyy girrl. Then he whistled. We’ve been together ever since!

I think not.

So how can you tell?

Well, I think it’s pretty safe to say the obnoxious guy who cat calls you off the street is probably not really as into you as he is into acting like a fool. If a guy is really interested, he’ll make it known. He’ll ask you to hang out one on one, or make an effort to find out more about you and what your interests are; if you’re Team Edward or Team Jacob, or if you prefer CSI Las Vegas or CSI Miami.

But if you are an analytical, and not arrogant person, it may be something that confuses you your whole life. I find it utterly perplexing. Just when I think I know a guy’s intentions, or lack thereof I often realize I am completely wrong.  Let me give you two examples. I invite you to play along.

1. I was driving to a charity event, and I was all dressed up. I won’t lie. I was feeling pret-ty good about my myself.  But I got stuck in traffic. So I decided to make a phone call to pass the time. ( It was legal back then, okay?) I’m chatting it up, having a grand ole time, when I notice a guy signaling for me to roll my window down.

Now, please know that I really try to be polite to all people, even tools, and I do not assume everyone with manparts is hitting on me. Quite the opposite actually. So normally, I would roll down the window and chat it up with some weirdo to be nice.

But I was in the middle of something and I thought, You know what?  No more Mrs. Nice Guy. Why should I drop everything I’m doing just to be on the receiving end of some impersonal, poorly-crafted pick- up line?  I’m going to stand up for myself and all the women in the world that deal with these creeps! Creeps that disturb women who are just trying to innocently talk and drive!

So, I conjured up the best bitch impression I could, pointed to my phone ( a pink Razr no less), and mouthed, “Sorry”, in the most stereotypical and condescending LA bimbo way possible. And he drove off.

Success! This behavior was so unlike me, but I was sort of enjoying it! I thought, Wow, I should do this more often! It’s fun, yet also effective. I continued to bask in my glory (and mastery of the male race) when two minutes later, another guy drove up and signaled for me to roll my window down.

Uh-oh.

I had a bad feeling. I mean I looked kinda nice, but it certainly wasn’t two hit-ons in two minutes kind of nice. So I decided to roll down my window, only to hear the guy yell,

You’ve got a flat tire!

Well.

That’s just great. Now not only did I have a flat tire, but I had a deflated ego! How mortifying! That first guy must have  laughed all the way up the 405 and maybe even to the 10 to the 110.

He must have thought, Eh screw it. Why should I go out of my way to help some conceited brat with an ugly pink razr that thinks every good samaritan is hitting on them?!

And who could blame him?

Verdict: Not hit on.

P.S. Why do only guys notice flat tires?

2. Me and my college roommate went to Subway pretty regularly and ordered the value meal. A duh.

Once, on our way home, I noticed they forgot a crucial part of the meal. Like a hungry person who didn’t receive the sweet and sour sauce for her chicken nuggets, I was pissed. My meal was ruined! I turned to Carrie, and  like a starving monster yelled,

THEY FORGOT OUR ^#*^$*@! COOKIES!!!!

She looked extremely confused. Oh great, I thought. You got your cookie and I didn’t! Well that’s just wonderful!!

Instead she said, Um, what cookies?

And I said, Um, hellooooooooo the ones that comes with the value meal?

And then she burst out laughing.

You mean those cookies we got last week? That doesn’t come with the meal. Those guys were hitting on us.

Well, slap me upside the head and steal my cookie! How was I supposed to know?!?!

Verdict: Hit on. Well according to her, anyway. I’d say they were flirting with us, or just had left over cookies.

Hopefully you will fare better in similar situations. It’s a confusing world, ladies. But even the shyest guy will make his feelings known if he is really interested in you. Don’t be Oblivious Olivia. Females are intuitive by nature so if you’re sensing signals you’re probably right. And you friends will step in and set you straight if you are being too oblivious or modest.

But don’t go crying He hit on me! too early.

You might want to check your tires first.